Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Kyle ("Joe") Scott's LiveJournal:

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Friday, April 8th, 2005
9:21 am	A Revelation For a second there, I thought maybe I was too hastey in my decision to completely discontinue by Blog/LJ. But then I saw the comments I got...all two of them...and I realized that it was probably the right move. I mean, when I first started my blog back in '02, I made it for my friends who were away at college (Bry, Leeja, Alice, Sonal, etc.). The idea was to give everyone a taste of Kyle so they'd have a way to keep up with current Kyle events and to have a reminder of what home feels like...which, for some reason, I assumed consisted of me ranting a lot. A lot happened in the course of the lifespan of the blog. I gained a lot of new friends and the blog became more for them than anything. Michael soonafter joined the community and started his blog almost in conjunction with mine. For a year and a half, the blog ran strong...in fact if you look at the archives, there's such a mass of material that I'm suprised I was even able to type that much and NOT have arthritis already. Then I started to slow down. I thought a change in pace was in order, so I started a new blog. Once I was in the groove of writing again, my readers went to the blog regularly...that is until I stopped writing once more. The thing about it this time, though, was that no one even seemed to notice. No tags on my board reading "POST KYLE, POST!" and no e-mails in my inbox with the subject heading "your latest blog entry." With the exception of a handful of people, no one cared what I wrote. And even if they did care, my new blogs began to become more intense, more thoughtful...and in turn, longer than ever...dissuading a lot of readers. So I thought. If no one's reading, why write? If no one cares, why should I care? I have to admit, the blog has become more for me that anything, but I think that migth be the problem. I've had so much going on in the past few months that I don't need the blog anymore. Of course, after the other day when I officially (yet, obviously unofficially) killed off my blogs, I found myself wanting to write about so many things and I wanted to click on over to blogger.com and write about any number of a dozen new thoughts. But I didn't. Instead I chose to write about this in hopes to explain that the death of my blog is not a result of some dramatic action just because I was pissy. I've lost posts before, I don't care about that. It was just sort of a reflection of the aggravation that even having a blog or livejournal causes me. Even though it doesn't mean anything, it does mean something. So, who knows? Maybe I'll start a new Livejournal...I've done that before and it's boosted me a little bit, but it doesn't seem to last. What it basically boils down to is that a.) I don't really need to write everthing I'm feeling anymore, and b.) no one wants to read anything I have to say unless it's something funny like my earlier posts. Maybe that's it...maybe I've just lost sight of what my original intent was. To give people a taste of Kyle. Kyle isn't like THIS post, Kyle's kooky, Kyle's funny, Kyle's harmless, blah blah blah. And when I break that, people just tune out. When I have something to say that I actually want people to hear, they don't care to listen. That bothers me. So, I might be back, I might not, I don't know. If I do, I just have a feeling it's not going to be the same, but for that handful of people who did bother to say anything (yes, even you, Tony, with your "You had a LJ?" comment), thank you. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, April 4th, 2005
10:41 am	OK. I just wrote a long...very long...post about recent movies. It was a damn good post and in it I mentioned many relevant things concerning who I am personally and it was also relevant to certain people who actually see this livejournal. But, because livejournal is having some sort of problem, it was whiped out. It's now in some sort of oblivion along with many other posts that this has happend to. Then, I wrote a post similar to this, explaining how my post was lost. In it, there were PLENTY of curse words and choice explicatives. But that post, too, was whiped out. I can't keep writing and pouring myself out just to have some computer take it all away from me. Therefore, that's it. I'm done with internet blogging. I'm doing my very best not to use any foul language because I don't think it's called for...for this is my last post. I'm sick and tired of losing posts, it's not worth the aggrevation of actually having posts make it. And why put myself through this torment if no one even reads what I have to say anyway? I've had it with blogs. I'm done. I'll still post on your respective journals, but there will be nothing new here, ever. I have a lot to say and if you want to know what it is I have to say, just ask me. But not here. Not anymore. I'm done. Goodbye. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, March 4th, 2005
10:54 am	Disneyland NOTE: BEFORE ANYONE SAYS ANYTHING, NO I DID NOT WRITE THIS POST IN ONE SITTING AND NO I DO NOT HAVE THAT MUCH TIME ON MY HANDS. THIS TOOK MONTHS TO WRITE. Someone mentioned something to me the other day and since then I've been thinking about it non-stop. I have come to the conclusion that there are two absolute Goods in the world: God and Disneyland. God's a given, but Disneyland truly IS the happiest place on Earth. I LOVE DISNEYLAND And I always have. My parents tell me that on my very first visit to Disneyland, as we were watching the Main Street Electrical Parade, I looked up at them and said, "Mommy, Daddy, I don't EVER want to go home!" And while I don't remember that day, I believe the sentiment is still there. Disneyland kicks. Remember how I was talking about how I can never write a post that's all positive? Well, get ready, here comes a biggie... Disneyland...where do I begin? Maybe I'll give you all a virtual tour. First, you park in Pinnochio...not Eyore, not Mickey...Pinocchio. Once you park, you stand in a horrendous line for tickets and then you have to dodge the people with cameras. This is possibly the only drawback to Disneyland, except for the crowds of people that show up on special occasions. But, of course all the hubbub doesn't even seem to matter once you go under that famous bridge and enter into another world. Walk down Main Street (stopping by the lockers, of course) and enjoy the early 20th century atmosphere. Listen to all of the sounds plugged in here and there and stop into the silent movie theater to catch glimpse of Mickey at his earliest. When you get to the main square, you have a few choices. To your left is Adventureland and Frontierland, respectively...and to your right is Tomorrowland and Fantasyland. Of course, I can't wait to get to Adventureland, so we head there straight away. Once in Adventureland, it's like you're in a marketplace in India. Disney's knack for creating atmosphere is outstanding, and Adventureland is a prime example. When I was a kid, I truely felt like I was in a jungle...now I'm more pumped because we're in Indiana Jones territory. Yes, in Adventureland you can find the Indiana Jones Adventure Ride. This is only one of the greatest rides ever made...not only because it's a ride featuring my hero, Indiana Jones but...oh wait, yea that IS why it's awesome! And basically all of Adventureland fits right into the theme...it's like being in the Temple of Doom or something...and right across the way is a store that sells Indi paraphinalia, including hats (and I happen to own one). Of course, when you're done with Indi, The Jungle Cruise is right there, which is ALWAYS a classic. Sometimes you get good guides, and sometimes you don't. But, an interesting fact is that Bill Murray and Steve Martin were both guides on the Jungle Cruise before going onto SNL fame, so many of the jokes you hear on the tour are Murray and Martin originals. Of course, if you have a gal with you, the nighttime cruise might be more effective, so you might want to save this one for after hours ;-) Then there's the Tiki Room, which is always a mystery to me. I mean, i've been in it and it's kind of cool, but I think it's been closed for a while. Anyway, if it's ever open, you should definitley give it a once over. At the edge of Adventureland, right past the Tarzan Treehouse (formerly known as the Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse) is New Orleans square. You might be tempted to go to your right and check out the Rivers of America and Tom Sawyer's island, but what you want to do is stay to your left because in just a few short feet, right under that bridge, is Walt Disney's favorite ride, The Pirates of the Caribbean. This one is another classic, of course. The ride's about 16 minutes long...and many will tell you it's not worth it...but I say to them, for shame! This ride is as classic as they come. Come on now...the dog with the key in it's mouth...the fat woman chasing the man (made PC by Gloria Alred)...the bride auction ("We want the redhead")..."Dead men tell no tales"..."A PIRATES LIFE FOR ME?!!" This ride is like a timecapsule...everytime I go on it I feel like I've always felt...it smells the same...it feels the same...it's like going into the past and I'm a kid again. Of course, the only other ride that does that for me is the very next ride you will experience...The Haunted Mansion. This ride is legitimately freaky at points. It starts out nice enough, with funny epitaphs inscribed on the tombstones in the front, but once you enter, you go into that famous room that expands and the classic Disney voiceover guy comes on to tell you that the room has "No windows...and NO DOORS!" And as you are looking for a way out, he goes, "But there's always...my way..." And then you see the hangman in the cieling...that's fuckin freaky, I'm sorry. Anyway, you then exit the room and walk a little bit. The pictures on the walls are cool and the atmosphere and sounds are just right (in fact, this is when you start hearing the organ playing that FANTASTIC eerie rendition of "Grim Grinning Ghosts"). When you get into your "doom buggies," you can now sit back with your partner and enjoy the music, visuals and sounds. Possibly the only thing cooler than the Haunted Mansion is The Haunted Mansion during Christmas time, where, for the past three or four years, they make up to have a Nightmare Before Christmas theme. Especially for a lover of Nightmare Before Christmas AND the Haunted Mansion, this is honestly one of the most amazing experiences ever. I'll save the details so that those of you who haven't experienced it yet will be suprised. Once you exit the Mansion, continue in the direction you were headed already. Soon you will hit Critter Country and in it you will find Splash Mountain. Now, I like this ride, yet it's always been sort of a mish-mosh to me. For one, the characters in the ride are from a film entitled "Song of the South." Everyone knows the famous title song of the ride, "Zippidy Doo Da," but most people don't realize that this music comes from "Song of the South." Furthermore, most people don't realize that they've never even seen "Song of the South." Why haven't you seen it? Because it was the only Disney movie ever to be BANNED by the NAACP. Apparently it was too racist and portrayed blacks as slow-witted slaves with a "Yess Massa" mentality. So, considering I've never even seen the movie, the characters don't have any sort of appeal to me. In fact, I could really care less if that rabbit gets it at the end of the ride. The cool thing about the ride is the fact that in the middle of it, the entire thing goes absolutely nuts...it's as if the ride suddenly took shrooms and we're plunged into hysteria along with it. Crazy ride, but well worth it. The drawback to Splash Mountain is that you now have to double-back because Critter Country comes to a perpetually frustrating dead-end suddenly. So, you go back past the Haunted Mansion, only this time you make a left, heading towards Frontierland. I'm not going to lie to you, Frontierland only exists so that there's a place to put Big Thunder Mountain. Of course, considering Thunder Mountain is one of the highlights of the park, I don't mind having this western detour in the middle of my Disney fun. Hit up Thunder Mountain and enjoy the "Wiiiiildest riiiiiide in the wilderness!" Next stop: Fantasyland...but not for long. You see, Fantasyland is classic Disney. These rides are usually seen as the "kiddie" rides and even I'll admit that sometimes I feel like I could skip Fantasyland altogether...but once you hit it, you really feel that sort of magic. You feel blasts of nostalgia and you get a sense of wonder as you look around and you're physically in a place that resembles some of your favorite childhood cartoon films. This is the heart of Disneyland...and that's why we have to skip it for now. I know you might want to stay and go on "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride" or "Peter Pan," but we will go on them later. You see, Fantasyland is better saved for the magic of the evening. So, we skirt the edge of Fantasyland and head on up to Toontown. On the way to Toontown you will see such Fantasyland classics as the Tea Cups, so you might want to stop off and try them out. You might find this amazing, but I have never been on the Tea Cups. You see, my mom gets sick really easily when it comes to things spinning around and once when she was younger, my uncle Greg spun the Tea Cups so much that she threw up on the ride. So, we steer clear of the Tea Cups...especially Tea Cup #6. Toontown is some great silly fun if you're with a bunch of great silly people. Unless you're age 11 or under, none of the rides will really appeal to you (except the Roger Rabbit ride because that's an amazing movie, but even that ride falls a bit short). However, all of the gags and photo ops make Toontown a place where older kids and even adults can really make some zany fun and goof off as if you were 11. My stay in Toontown lasts about 15 minutes or so, not too long...but like I said...we always have a blast. The next stop is the most dreaded of all. The "It's A Small World" portion of the day always seems like the longest. I mean, here we are...we've been through half of Disneyland and it's the middle of the day. I'm hot and hungry (all I've had to eat at this point is a frozen banana and maybe a sandwich brought from home, because those Disney burgers cost a fortune) and I'm getting tired. We hit "It's A Small World" and I see the horrendously long line with NO SHADE AT ALL and I just go into a funk. I usually am very quiet during this portion of the day, half to show my parents that I am discontented, half because I literally just need the rest. I use the ride as doze-off time and my Dad usually ends up getting annoyed with me. Of course, we need this during the day...we need that one point where we're all pissed at each other so we can get it out and overwith...and it might as well be during the most irritating and pointless ride of them all. Once out of that situation, the second wind comes with the sight of the Matterhorn. The Matterhorn Bobsleds used to be fun, but now I think there's something wrong with the breaks and they just haven't gotten around to fixing them yet. We usually go on and we usually have a good time and we always scream at the abominable snowman, but eventually the ride begins to feel unsafe and my enjoyment of the ride is hindered by my prayers to God, asking him to get us off of this ride alive. After that very sobering experience, we walk past what used to be the Submarine Voyage. You see Autopia close by, but that's never really been a "must" in my repitoir. You can do this now or save it for later. I'd save it for later, personally because coming up is my favorite portion of the day: Tomorrowland. There's something about Tomorrowland that I absolutely love...oh wait, it's SPACE MOUNTAIN!! Space Mountain is the greatest roller coaster ever. Sure, it's not that big and there's no loops...but it's the roller coaster with the most atmosphere ever. First you wait in a long line that is pretty horrible, and your only entertainment comes from watching the people in the arcade below have fun or occasionally watching the Rocket Rods (now the "Astro Orbiter") go around (while playing Rocketeer music). But you then move inside and again, the atmosphere takes over. In fact, let me pause here to say something about Disneyland ride lines in general - they really know what they're doing. I mean, sure Space Mountain, Indiana Jones, and Star Tours (which I will get to) have the longest lines, but I look forward to waiting in those lines because the entire line is like a ride unto itself, filled with countless extras to keep you amused and entertained through the entire wait (especially Indiana Jones). Of course, Space Mountain has been closed for the past 4 years, but it's actually about to make a triumphant return THIS YEAR. Apparently, the ride itself hasn't been touched much, but the line, the cars, and the entire docking station has been re-vamped. I'm REALLY looking forward to see what they've done with the place. But most of all, I'm looking forward to getting on that train again...taking off into that cheesey red-light vortex, and enjoying the roller coaster through the darkness of Disney space. Man oh man, I cannot wait to feel that ride again. Tomorrowland actually has an extremely interesting history of rides. In our lifetime, we've seen the "People Movers" come and go twice, we've seen "Captain EO" (starring Michael Jackson and directed by Francis Ford Coppola) turn into "Honey I Shrunk the Audience," and the Carousel Theater turned into the "America Sings" theater, then into the "Super Speed Tunnel" (and later, "The World of Tron") for the People Mover guests, then into office space for a few years, and then finally into the West Coast home of Epcot's "Innoventions" in 1998. I remember a lot of these, especially the People Movers, which were sort of...well, pointless, but I remember them nonetheless. Of course, the childhood favorite was "Star Tours." I think it's fairly safe to say that Star Tours is hugely responsible for my love of "Star Wars." I mean, to a child, watching a movie and then going out and living portions of that same movie really makes the connection between the child, the ride, and the movie very special. It's really one of those things that will always have a place in my heart no matter what happens to it in the future. I just hope George Lucas doesn't go in and replace the Paul Reubens robot with Jar Jar Binks. After riding Star Tours, you exit into the "Startrader," which is my favorite gift shop in the park. Pick up cool "Star Wars"/Tours memorabilia and/or Disneyland souveniers HERE. It's the only way to go. The best gift shop USED to be the one you exit into after Pirates of the Caribbean, but now it's just not the same...partly because I'm a little too old to appreciate the fake pirate swords and stuff, and partly because half of it was re-done to make an entire store full of overly-priced (but pretty cool) "Nightmare Before Christmas" murchandise. By now it's early evening and I'm getting pretty hungry. Luckily, once you exit Tomorrowland, you are right in the center of the park in the Central Plaza. This is where you can stop for some good photo ops of the Magic Castle, the entrance signs to all the differend Lands, and of course, the famous statue of Walt Disney (without whom none of this good old family fun would be possible) and Mickey Mouse. Of course, the REALLY good thing about being in the Central Plaza in this time of night is that anywhere you decide to go for dinner is about the same distance away, so it's not like it's any more hassle to walk over to New Orleans Square than it is to go to Big Thunder Ranch to eat. Of course, while there are many places to eat int he park, New Orleans Square is pretty much always the winner. The Square is filled with all types of restaurants. Most of these are similar in nature (buffet style) and any one will suffice, so I will not bother going into naming the different choices. On the way to the square, you might want to stop by the Bengal BBQ, the favorite stop of many Disneyland goers, as it offers spicey meat skewers and is actually very good...as it definitley does not have that pre-packaged feeling you get from ordering an over the counter burger from the Hungry Bear Restaurant in Critter Country. However, it is important to note that the one gourmet sit-down retaurant inside the park is the Blue Bayou restaurant. This restaurant is located partly inside the Pirates of the Caribbean ride (you notice it once you get on the boats, right about when you see the hick playing the banjo). Because this restaurant has the best ambiance and accordingly some of the highest prices. The seating at the Bayou is 100% priority (reserved) seating, so call in advance to make your reservation. The other restaurant to mention is the "secret" Club 33. Of course, this club is not open to the public, but it's been an infamous part of Disneyland for years. You must become a member (there is a waiting list, but you can ask for information at Town Hall) or know a member to get in. Right next to the Blue Bayou entrance, there is a plain-looking door marked "33," and that is the entrance. You buzz in, give your name, and the door is unlocked electronically. Once in, you ascend (via glass elevator) to the second floor, where the main dining hall awaits you, exquisitely upholstered and serviced by a wonderful and well-trained staff. Of course, I've never been into Club 33, but it's one of those things about Disneyland that's cool to know and is always an option for the future so you can enhance your Disneyland-going experience. After dining and finally feeling completely re-plenished, it might be a good time to squeaze in one or two repeat rides before you have to settle youself down to get a good seat for Fantasmic. Fantasmic is a live-action show that's actually performed ON the Rivers of America. You'll notice that starting at about 6 o'clock, people have already started lying down blankets and setting up shop to get a good seat in front (facing Tom Sawyer's Island) for the show. The first show usually starts at about 8:30-esque (times change pending on season), so we usually try to get there at about 7 to get a decent seat. There is, of course, the boring hour or so of nothing, accentuated by the fals excitement of the guy coming on to tell you that the show will begin in a half hour, fifteeen minutes, five minutes...and then ten minutes later the show starts. But Fantasmic is worth the wait. In short, Fantasmis is about 22 minutes of WOW. It's the best live show ever. The music, the action, the waterworks, the fireworks...everything about that show is amazing. And at the end, you just feel like it's the best two hours spent on your ass ever. After Fantasmic, you want to head right over to the Magic Castle to catch (if you can) the "Believe" fireworks show. Sure, the "believe" song they play is cheesey, but it's a really impressive fireworks display. If you like fireworks, like I do, this will definitley be a memorable part of your evening. Of course, the crowd might be a turn-off for you at this point and you might be tempted to leave. But just remember, if you're thinking about leaving, someone IS leaving, so if you head over to Fantasyland right now, the crowd will only be medium-sized (except for the "Mr. Toad" ride, which is always the longest for some crazy reason). Now, after experiencing all of Disneyland and the magic of the night lights, now you can really enjoy the classic Disney rides. Rides like Peter Pan will always have a special place in my heart. Some of these old-fashioned rides are actually a little freaky. I mean, the witch in Snow White always scared me, as does Stromboli in Pinocchio. The one "What the Hell?" ride would have to be "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride." For some reason, people love Mr. Toad. Personally, I never got it. I mean, a.) I don't even know what cartoon he originated from, and b.) the ride consists of him driving around, crashing, going to hell...and then the ride's over. I mean, he doesn't even come BACK from hell. He just goes to hell in a wave of psychodelia and then BAM, back to the entrance. A bizaar experience, to say the least. Anyway, linger in Fantasyland as long as you like, but then there'll soon be that point in the evening where everyone looks at each other and it's decided that it's time to go home. You head on down to the Central Plaza and walk down Main Street once more, possibly stopping by the gift shops, but I would avoid it. This is the time of night where everyone's leaving and everyone's looking through those shops. It's crowded, it's hot, and you're tired...so please please PLEASE buy your souvenirs during the day. You get on the tram and head back to the Pinnochio parking lot and you look at whatever you got during the day and begin to associate them with the memories you had that day and the memories you've always had of Disneyland. You're glad to be going home, yet you can't wait to go again. You know that when you do go again, whether it be next year or 30 years from now, you are going to have a great time again, as you always have. You will go with your family...your friends...your loved ones...and maybe one day your own children. And you also know that, while you could follow my planned trip through Disneyland, no matter what order you do anything in Disneyland, it's all going to be a great experience...an always familiar yet perpetually new experience. That's what makes Disneyland the happiest place on Earth. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, February 25th, 2005
10:24 am	Baby Schlock Who do diaper commercials think their target audience is? I'm watching TV and this commercial comes on featuring a band of babies on a stage dancing and singing to a song about diapers in the style of N'Sync. I cannot imagine an expecting mother would buy a diaper purely because the music was in the style of N'Sync...who the hell is this commercial trying to attract? I mean, the babies don't think they're gonna look as good as those dancing babies on TV, and unless their target audience is 13 year old girls (which might actually be the answer), women are not going to dooped by flashing lights and a song about the latest in diaper fashion. And speaking of diaper fashion...I want to say something to parents: put some freaking clothes on your kids. I get yelled at when I walk around in my boxers, but a two year old runs rampant in the house in his birthday suit and you take pictures, laugh, and tell your friends. It's freakin sick is what it is...teach the kid to have some shame. (Comment on this)
10:23 am	"Canoga Guy" or "Sorry, All Outta Gay" I recently apologized for not being gay. I still don't know why. I was out the other day with a friend of mine and as we were just hangin around near the Topanga Plaza, some guy comes up to me and asks, "Hey, my friend over there wants to know if you're gay." I said, "No, sorry." I actually said sorry for not being gay. What's with that? It's as if I felt like I let him down, ya know? I felt like a guy working at a cheese shop and apologizing that I was out of gouda. "Nope, sorry. All outta gay." This reminded me of one time in my first year with Acadeca (Academic Decathlon). It was the day of the actual competition...the day of the Superquiz, for those of you who watched it. The Superquiz is the last event of the day, but before that, all of the Decathletes are piled into this hall, seated in rows and are given seven multiple choice tests. They split up your team...so you don't cheat, I guess...by placing you all in different rows, but if you looked around, you could see all your teammates. If I looked back over my left shoulder, I was able to see my teammate, Bryan. So, after every test, I would look back over my shoulder to see if Bryan would give me a thumbs up or thumbs down, depending on how he thought he did on the test. Some of the times though, because he was so far away, he didn't realize I was looking back at him, so I would kinda stare over towards him, waiting for him to look at me. Anyway, after the testing was over, all the team members found each other and we all walked out of the hall together. As we were walking out, a girl I had met at the scrimmage from Canoga Park High, Rosie, came up to me and said, "Hey, remember me?" I said, "Yeah, of course. What's up?" She said, "Well, my friend over there asked me to come over because...well, he thought you were looking at him during the test." Now, when I first heard this, I automatically thought this guy thought I was mad-doggin him or something. I thought he wanted to like beat me up or something. So, I asked, "What do you mean?" And she said, "Well, he thought maybe you were looking at him like...you know..." and then she made like the "weak wrist" motion that would imply that I was gay! This guy from Canoga Park thought I was like checking him out or something! So, I said, "Oh! No! I wasn't looking at him like that, no. I was looking at my friend!" And Rosie kind of laughed and then started to walk off. I yelled after her, "Really! I'm serious! I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!" But, I don't know...I made the terrible mistake of telling my teammates what happened and I've been ridiculed ever since. So, for years, my "Canoga Guy" story has been an Acadeca favorite. Hell, Bryan mentions it to me every other day...he even made fun of me about it in my yearbook. Oh well, I guess I'm just irresistable...to both sexes. (Comment on this)
Monday, February 14th, 2005
11:38 am	Down With "Singles Awareness Day" want you to get up now. Get up and go to your window. Open your window and stick your head out of the window and yell 'I'm as mad as Hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore.'" What the hell is wrong with this country when a day set aside as a feast for a catholic saint eventually becomes "Singles Awareness Day?" I'll tell you what's wrong with it...it's going down the shitter - and fast. We take everything: Christmas, Easter, All Souls Day, St. Patrick's Day, Valentine's Day - and turn them into something SO commercial that it's almost taboo to talk about the real reason we're celebrating the holiday. Example: we all know why we celebrate Christmas. We all know that the date picked for that day is arbitrary and we all know that Hannukah falls around the same time for that particular reason (fact, not opinion). But the second we mention the "reason for the season" we get people yelling and screaming "separation of church and state!" If you don't want to celebrate Christmas, then don't, otherwise stop complaining when I mention Jesus or God. You want to horn in on my holiday? I really don't care either way because hell, who WOULDN'T want a day set aside to get free crap, but don't make a fuss when I talk about the reason for the holiday exists to begin with. That or make your own damn holiday if you want and stop celebrating Christmas without mentioning Jesus...stop celebrating Hanukah if you're not Jewish...stop calling Valentine's Day "Singles Awareness Day"...you want a day set aside to wear green? Then do it on a day besides March 17, please. Only this country makes a big deal about St. Patrick's Day. Hell, in Ireland the only thing they do for St. Patty's Day is have an extra bowl of soup or maybe two potatos. And when did this country become so obsessed with the formalities of modern relationships that we have to take a day that was set aside for a saint (a saint!) and make it a day to make single people feel shitty for not having someone to be with? Think I'm exaggerating? Visit any livejournal or xanga (more like it) of a 17 to 21 year old single female and see if they DON'T mention their self-pity today. Of course, they wouldn't feel as bad today if we used this day for it's original purpose of to celebrating the charity of a Roman priest who was also a physician that cured the sick of ailments without accepting any payment. Instead, we focus on "Singles awareness" because the exploration of religious tradition is more taboo than the exploitation of it for some twisted reason. The job of the state is to make sure there is a separation of church and state, not to exploit religion and desensitize a nation to the fact that this is a country of many creeds. Instead of celebrating our cultural and religious diversity, we cut it out altogether whenever we can. St. Velentine's Day and Christmas can't "become too religious," it's a religious holiday to begin with. So, leave it alone. Instead of regulating who can say what about whatever holiday and when they can say it, why don't you just back the fuck off?! Bleeding hearts, my ass...sounds like too much mental masturbation, to me. Of course, ethics aside, let's not forget that this new title doesn't do much for couples. If I were still single, I'd be pissed off like I usually am, but I have a girlfriend this year and I'm not going to lie to you; I plan on taking advantage of Valentine's Day to do something special (and possibly get something special in return...no, not in a dirty way) with Rosy. However, where it used to be that couples could take advantage of a day filled with hearts and chocolates as an excuse to be as sickeningly romantic as possible, one finds it hard and almost impossible to enjoy this day when the entire heart (excuse the pun) of the holiday has been ripped from society's chest and replaced by some euphamistic liberal dribble like "Singles Awareness Day." I don't know about you, but I find it heart to get into the spirit of things when I know I'm taking part in some hippie in San Francisco's political agenda. I realize, of course, that Rosy's a hippie herself and that this post, while seemilgly militant, is also completely hypocritical. For that, all I have to say is I'm a man; a man of strong convictions and weak will, but a man nonetheless. And a man can't turn down a woman like Rosy when she wants to be romantic. So, for completely selfish reasons, I will participate in Joe Treehugger and Jane Flagburner's quest to erraticate God as we know Him in society. But, just because a man realizes his futility in a societal circumstance such as this and acts upon it doesn't mean that he has to agree with it or be happy about it. And so I'll continue to yell and scream and be submersively furious and I'll write angry posts and I'll get into arguments with friends and family and teachers about the deterioration of ethics and morals in contemporary society. But, when it comes to days that can be potentially beneficial to a relationship, I'll take what I can get when I can get it. As they say: if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. However, I will never refer to Valentine's Day as Singles Awareness Day. There are limits even a man of my typical male nature won't push. So, for now, have a Happy Valentine's Day everyone. Celebrate it in whichever way you see fit or don't celebrate it and let the world know you're mad. Because, as Peter Finch said in Network, before you do something about anything and before you can improve yourself or change the world, "First, you've got to get mad." (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, February 3rd, 2005
1:38 pm	Marvin Gaye Sucks or Excuse Me, Mrs. Assfire, But Can You Spare A Square? Alright, I know it's been on everyone's mind and I think it's time someone addressed it. Why are porn titles in movies/television spoofs of actual movie titles? I mean, I'm watching Married With Children, and Al goes into the porn section and he says all these titles like Forrest Hump, Mrs. Assfire, and The Whole 9 Inches. I've also seen that it's popular for SNL and Mad TV to do this as well, they've come up with such titles as Rambone and Saving Ryan's Privates. Why do they do that? It strikes me as odd that people mock these titles and films when the porn industry is one of the largest in the world. Like...why does everyone pick on porn so much when a large percent of the population watches or has watched it at some point...and let me tell you, they don't watch it just to get a good laugh. But my the real thought I had about this was how cliches are such a large part of society nowadays...and no one seems to motice or even care. Take bodily humor, for example. It's like every comedy today has some scene where someone farts in the bathtub or has diahrea or someone pees in public but something is blocking them so it looks like a statue is peeing or something. Don't people like remember previous movies? When I was watching Scary Movie 2, there's a scene in the beginning where James Woods has diarhea and the audience was like laughing their stupid heads off. Two things bothered me about this...one, I just saw a scene identical to this in Dumb and Dumber the day before...and two, is it really even that funny? It's disgusting, is what it is...do you laugh when you have diahrea? I just think that fart humor is like the lowest form of humor...and it takes no discipline to attain it because everyone can do it...it's just not smart humor...it's just not funny. Yet, it's so prevalent in movies today. What the hell? And speaking of porn, why is it that whenever a "love scene" is comming up in a movie, the saxaphone starts playing? Like the rest of the movie is saxaphone-free, but once two people start to go at it, the sax comes right in. What, are we supposed to be reminded of the song stylings of Barry White or Issac Hayes or Marvin Gaye? Just because these men wrote songs very blatently describing the act of sex, does this automatically put the audience "in the mood"? I'll tell you one thing, when I think of Marvin Gaye, I get pissed off. I mean, censorship is running wild in America...books and movies are being banned, and parents aren't letting their children buy Blink 182 cd's because they say "Ass," but Marvin Gaye writes a song about "getting it on" and "giving it to me" and Barry White sings songs about "love mounds" and they become classics...hell, my 10 year old sister knows the words to "Let's Get It On" and "I Believe In Miracles." When there's a steamy sex scene and the sax pops in, I want to throw up. I mean, it's the same damn thing...can't people think of anything different? New?? What's wrong with people??? Why am I the only sane person in America? Can someone help me with this? (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, January 8th, 2005
12:05 pm	Pimp My Ride How do you spell that guy's name on "Pimp My Ride?" Is it "XZibit" or "Exhibit" or "Exebition" or...anyway, you know the guy I'm talking about. Well, anyway fuck him, I pimped my own ride, bitch! My car's shaping up to be pretty sweet these days, and I got a few things for X-mas that pushed it all the way from "decent car with no power locks" to "decent car with no power locks and some stupid-cool style." XZibit A.) The epitomy of koool, my "White Shadow" decal is placed along the top-center of my rear window. For those of you who don't know, White Shadow is the greatest band that never was. I was the lead singer, of course, and Benny and Dustin were on guitar. If it weren't for our flaky drummer Mimi who left us before our first concert, we would be in Germany right now in the middle of our world tour...and instead of sitting here in my boxers, I'd be surrounded by chicks from all nations with two lines in front of me...one line of girls to my right for make-outs, and one line of guys to my left for high-fives. So, the White Shadow decal is not just there because it's a nickname given to me at a beach once (leave that one to your imaginations), but it's a symbol of the awesomeness that I am capable of...if we had a drummer. XZibit B.) My Jack Skellington decal. Sure, Tim Burton and Nightmare Before Christmas memorabilia especially are staples at any "Hot Topic" location, but it's been one of my favs long before the Emo's came to town. This decal features Jack giving us a mean grin and is placed on the rear passenger-side window. XZibit C.) My new Family Guy window-sucker thing. It features one of the most kick-ass members of the most kick-ass cartoon ever (besides The Adventures of Bullwinkle and Rocky), Stewie, a one-year old talking baby who has delusions of matricide and is bent on world domination. It features him saying "I'm a baudy little monkey!" This traffic-sign-shaped little message is located on the rear driver's side window. Thanks to my bro for the present. XZibit D.) Also from my bro, my new driver's side floormat featuring the most bad-ass character to ever be cut from contruction paper, Eric Cartman. This is possibly my favorite edition to my kick-ass ride, with the exception of one thing, and that is............ XZibit E.) The new stereo. Yes, for X-mas, my parents got me a new stereo for my car. A Sony with a removable face and a case to carry it in. I saw the receipt, and let me tell you: based on the price, this thing better knock my socks off. It's not installed yet because stupid Best Buy won't do it until Thursday, but that means only 5 more days until I can finally put in a burned CD and not have to wait 3 minutes until it decides to play it. I will finally be able to skip through my CD's so I don't have to listen to the stupid overture of "The Matrix: Reloaded" before I get to "Burly Brawl." I can finally play all my most important mixes, including Kyle's World Famous Make-Out Mix, which only 6 or 7 girls have heard...of course, the number is now sure to increase because Sony + Kyle = Ultra-Sexy. So, let's re-cap. Sweet decals, South Park floormat, awesome new stereo, and an aMAZing dude at the wheel. I fucking rock. (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, January 7th, 2005
5:04 pm	Movies Movies are a touchy subject for me. Well, no let me say this another way...people think movies are a touchy subject for me. But, in actuality, it's only that I think movies are important and shouldn't be taken as lightly as people tend to do. Movies have the ability to touch all of our lives in different ways (ok Acadeca ppl, I know you've heard this before, but hang in there..). I mean, one movie can make one person cry, another laugh, and another sick to his or her stomach. The same movie can do this to different people. And I'm just seriously in awe of that fact. That's one of the reasons why I want to be a filmmaker so badly...that and I like to tell a story. But, am I touchy about movies? I don't know. I mean, I do have a history of being weird when it comes to movies. Some of my most irrarional moments have been over movies. I always have a fight with Leeja and Deep over Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom because I love that movie and they call it crap. And seriously the first time we fought about it...like she was just kinda playing, but I took it way seriously and I was at school at the time and I was so into my argument that I guess I was kinda flailing about (I talk with my hands, you kno) and people were laughing because they had never seen me so upset about something. One time for my birthday I had a bunch of people over to watch 2001: A Space Odyssey because it's sort of a tradition for me to watch that movie on my birthday, so I thought I'd have my friends over to share it with. But my friends were so impatient and not even trying to care about the movie that they made me turn it off during intermission. Yes, my friends made me turn off my favorite movie on my birthday during intermission. But, I was almost glad to do it because they were laughing and joking through the whole thing and they weren't watching it anyway. And I think that's where people think I get touchy about a movie. See, yes...I am annoyed when people talk through a good movie and try to joke with me or something...not because I only want to watch the movie and not joke, but because I feel that a movie should be a shared experience...like in showing 2001, I was trying to share something really important to me and they didn't really care. That's what upsets me. That and ignorance. We have a family friend named Rhonda. Now, every time I watched a movie with Rhonda, I got pissed...period. Even over crappy movies. Like we were watching Escape from LA (terrible movie) and she was like mocking the ending and saying "oh yea right like that could happen!" But, like...that's the point of the movie...it's supposed to be impossible..that's like the fun of the movie (bad as it might be)...I mean hasn't she heard of temporary suspension of disbelief? I was so mad at her because I felt that she wasn't giving this movie any credit, when every movie deserves some, that I stormed out of her house and walked home before the movie even ended. And also, I do have a thing where when people attack one of my personal favorite movies I get really pissed. I get pissed because it's a personal favorite of mine and offending it is like offending me almost. Like one time we were watching Superman: The Movie and my mom and Rhonda were watching it with me. When Superman throws the green crystal out into nowhere and then the Fortress of Solitude forms, my mom was like, "Well, how did he know when and where to throw the crystal?" And I tried explaining to her how he knew...because the movie does explain it...but no...they wouldn't listen to me and they just went on and on about how the movie had all these holes. I was so enraged at how they were attacking this movie that I stormed out of the living room and went into my room and I slammed the door so hard that my door jammed and I was accidentally locked in my room. But, you see it wasn't that I was touchy about the movie...I was mad at them because they were attacking the movie without any grounds whatsoever. Like, there's an obvious answer to why he throws the crystal...he says it for Christ's sake!...yet they just had to go on about it. Then, there's the widescreen fiasco. You see, some people just don't understand the concept of widescreen formatted movies. When a movie is filmed, it is filmed so that the screen is much wider than it is high...so it's like a rectangle...but TV sets are square. So, when you see a movie that is full screen, what's actually happening is that they cut off the sides of the movie to make it fit your screen. When you watch a movie full screen, they are cutting off parts of the movie! But with widescreen, those parts are put back...the "black bars" on the bottom and top are there because there is nothing to go there...they are not "cutting off" anything...in fact, you are getting more picture. But no...people refuse to believe this...including my father. Every time we watch a movie in widescreen format, he has to comment how he can't see the picture and that he hates widescreen because it cuts off the top and bottom. And you know what...my father and I have a really bad history with movies as well. Like one time we were watching The Godfather Part 3 and at the end Michael Corleone (Al Pacino) breaks down and cries because someone dies (I won't say who). And it's a really emotional scene because for 3 movies, we have seen this guy be so strong and everything and this is the first time we see him cry...I mean this guy finally breaks down...and I mean it was so emotional that I almost started to cry. But the thing is that when Al Pacino starts to cry, like he is crying so hard that no sound is comming out...u kno what that's like...when you like get the wind knocked out of you or something and no sound comes out...that's how hard he was crying...and my dad was like "Oh, just cry already you pussy! Wimp!" And I was so furious that I told my dad off right then and there and we didn't speak for like a whole week. And now we can never watch The Godfather Part 3 in my house ever again. But it's not me! Don't you see? It's them! I'm not touchy about movies... Below is a scene from Ridley Scott's Bladerunner in it's originally filmed widescreen format. Below is the same scene "formatted" to fit your screen. This is what you see when you watch Bladerunner in full screen. And people complain that widescreen cuts off something. Think about this next time your favorite movie is on TV. For more info on the widescreen format, go to http://www.thedigitalbits.com/articles/anamorphic/aspectratios/widescreenorama.html (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, December 30th, 2004
4:57 pm	Oscar Buzzzz It has now been 3 whole weeks since I've updated this blog, and I feel like I should write something. Unfortunately, nothing entertaining comes to mind. I've been slightly more self-involved than usual lately. Instead of ranting about the world around me, I've been spending more time focusing on the crazy December schedule and a few personal issues. I could write about the ever-controversial topic of the movie version of The Phantom of the Opera, but after much anguish, I've decided against discussing the movie any further. Let's suffice to say that I gave it 3 stars out of 4. Why not more? Why not less? None of your business, just go see it. Oscar season has officially ended, and I have been thouroughly unimpressed. Every year, people ask me what my Oscar predictions are, but this year I find myself almost speechless. I have a feeling that I will be upset come March. I can honestly say that this has been one of the most disappointing years for movies in quite some time. It's sad when a highlight of the year is a movie featuring Will Ferrel crying over a dog that was kicked over a bridge by Jack Black. Legitimate Highlights of the year: Spiderman 2, The Incredibles, and the best movie I've seen all year, Collateral. I haven't seen Closer, but I have a feeling that will earn a few nodds. Hotel Rwanda will most likely get a few acting nominations, and inevitably Clint Eastwood will get a nomination or ten for Million Dollar Baby purely because he's Hollywood's favorite old liberal fart. It doesn't look like Johnny Depp delivered exactly what was hoped for in Finding Neverland, but Leonardo DeCaprio blew me away in The Aviator, even though the movie itself never really took off (get it?). Also, I wouldn't be suprised if Kate Blanchette wins both an Oscar and a Razzy for her cooky-yet-all-too-real Katherine Hepburn impression. Of course, the discussion of acting nominations is almost futile because we all know Jamie Foxx has it in the bag for Ray. Of course, I wouldn't mind a win for Foxx, he sure deserves it - he was responsible for two of the best performances in 2004. As for Best Actress, I think one of the girls from Closer might take it, but that's only because people seem to have forgotten Meryl Streep's truly vibrant presence in The Manchurian Candidate. Hopefully Phantom will get some sort of nodd for musical adaptation and probably original song (the new one in the credits), but we all know it really belongs to Marc Shaiman and the South Park boys for "Lonely" from Team America: World Police. In all, this critic thinks the Academy should either save their gold and call off the Awards this year and wait for better competition from next year or give the Best Actor award to Jamie Foxx and the rest of the statuettes should rightfully go to Anchorman. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, November 29th, 2004
10:00 am	Once Upon A Time In The Library You've got to be ruthless. It's finals week here in the computer lab and everyone wants a computer. This pisses me off because the rest of the year, you can easily walk in and sit down at the computer of your choice and skip off into internet fun or to write your little papers or what have you. About two weeks before finals roll around, though, it gets harder to look for a computer. This is when the "Vultures" pop up - people who walk around in circles just waiting for you to pack up your stuff and sign off of your computer so that they can move in. I know it's not their fault, but there's nothing more annoying than reaching into your backpack to get a paper and three Vultures run over to you to see if you're getting up, and when it turns out that you're just getting a paper, they all leave and give you dirty looks as if you've tricked them on purpose somehow. The week of finals, however, is absolute war. "Vultures" become "Rogue Mercenaries" out to do anything and everything to get a computer, even if it means breaking all of their previous moral standards. Today was extremely ridiculous. I walked into the computer lab and I seriously had to wait for about 15 minutes before I was able to steal a computer for myself...and it wasn't easy either. In the beginning stages of computer-searching, there is the "Individual Aisle Search," in which you walk down every aisle to check every computer, just to make sure that there aren't any computers that the other Mercenaries have missed (which is quite unlikely). Then, there's the "Perimiter Serveilance" stage, in which you are now forced to stand in a corner somewhere to get a full view of the library computer lab. From this vantagepoint, you can A.) see any movement in the computer area, and B.) view your competition. In finals week, competition is stiff, so you're forced to move into the next and final stage, the "Aisle Stakeout." This is where you are forced to take one position at the end of an aisle and basically wait for someone in "your" aisle to abandon their computer so that you can comendeer it. However, in serious wartime, aisle stakeouts are corrupted by "Claimjumpers." Usually, the aisle stakeout is viewed as a last resort, and even other mercenaries respect your claim. But, claimjumpers feel that they have some sort of right to move in on the action of your aisle, even though you are (and have been) obviously waiting for a computer in your row. For example, this morning I was in my aisle steakout when all of a sudden, a black girl got up from her computer. She was getting her stuff together and I didn't want to seem like I was rushing her, so I stood back a bit, eyeing the other Mercenaries and giving them visual confirmation that this was indeed my computer. Finally, the girl gets her stuff together and as I'm walking to go to the computer, some blonde kamikaze literally runs into position and steals my chair! Of course, these claimjumpers know that they are outlaws and they don't even give you the "I'm sorry" curtesy look. I gave an "I'm pissed" look anyway, and went to return to my post when - can you believe it??!! - someone had taken my steakout potision! Some asian girl was standing in my set post...it was an ambush! So, I turned the opposite direction and fled. Now we have one of the most ugly phases of library war: "The Showdown." There is nothing pretty about the showdown. Both mercenaries on opposite ends of the same aisle make direct eye contact and then let the games begin. Any movement from the aisle between us can either be a potential free computer, or a wild goose chase. We stared at each other. A fly buzzes by my ear. The wind whistles by and rustles a paper on a nearby desk. A tumbleweed rolls by. Then, a hispanic man begins to stir in his seat, and right behind him, a little downwind from me, an asian man grumbles and shifts his papers. Two possible computers...two mercenaries...one outcome. Her hand twitched. My eye squinted. I made my move, and she did, too. Even though he was farther from me and closer to her, I went for the asian man because he was grabbing for his jacket. I moved with great swiftness towards my goal, so fast in fact that I reached him before she could, so she ran for the hispanic man who was now closing his explorer window! The asian man went to sit back down and it looked like I was defeated, but in fact, he was just reaching for a disk still in the hard drive. I looked back and to my great satisfaction, the hispanic man was telling the girl that he wasn't leaving. She turned to look at me, her conqueror, and I shot her a smile. She responded with a grimace and went back to her claim. I had won the showdown. I took out a pretty girl in the process, which is not something I'd normally do...but this is war...and nothing but silence is sacred here in the library. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, November 15th, 2004
10:59 am	"Handi-capable" (A.K.A. Slap in the Face) Ugh...I don't even know if I want to write this, but I feel it's my responsibility to say what everyone dares not to say. So, here we go. I'm really annoyed when I have to wait for handicapped people. I know I should be understanding of other people's situations, but seriously we have to wait for them all the time. This morning there was this bus that pulled up while I was waiting to cross the street and they were "loading" a man in a wheelchair onto the bus. This process, if you've ever seen it, takes like 10 minutes. If I were on that bus, I'd be super pissed. Basically what ends up happening in this world is that we feel like handicapped people HAVE to go first no matter what the cost to us is. Sure, I could be late for a meeting or the new episode of South Park or something, but because the wheelchair guy gets on the bus, I'm going to miss the whole show. We let them cut in front of us in rides, too! I mean, they don't even have to stand up in the freakin line...they can just sit and move along with the rest of us, but no. They get to cut all the way to the front, taking MY seat on the roller coaster. And when you're ON rides it happens, too. Ever go on the Haunted Mansion ride at Disneyland and the car stopps and the guy comes on and says in a ghoulish voice, "Sorry, the spirits grow restless. Please stay in your DOOOOOM BUGGIES!" Yea, translation: wheelchair guy made us stop the moving walkway so he can get on. But, it's not them that I'm annoyed with. It's us - the non-handicapped people who feel like they have to feel sorry for the "handi-capable." We can assign euphamisms and give them their own parking spaces and let them go to the front of the line all we want, but in the end it's just because we feel sorry for them, but no one wants to say it. And why don't we want to admit that we're sorry for handicapped people? Because they get pissed when we are. Ever notice how ANNOYED handicapped people get when you offer help? There's a guy in a wheelchair who can't move anything but his pinky and he gets mad when we hold the door for him or something. "What, you think I can't do it by myself?" Well, honestly, no...and you don't have to be such an asshole about it either. Hell, when I'm on crutches I take all the help I can get. I milk it for all it's worth. The fact is that yes, they can use the help, but offering it to them is insulting. Think about it...if they've been handicapped all their life, then there's really nothing handicapped about them. They've figured a way to deal by now. Take, for instance, my friend Daryl. Daryl has one leg and he has two crutches that he uses at all times. When I first met him, it was at the bowling alley. He's a friend of Tony's and back in the day, Tony and I and a few people would go bowling like all the time. So, one time he brought Daryl bowling. Of course, I felt bad because I thought...well, gee isn't it kind of rude to invite a man with one leg to go bowling? What's he gonna do sit and cheer for Tony? But, Daryl shows up and bowls right along with the rest of us...and he's damn good. Since then, I've gotten to know Daryl pretty well. I've gone bowling again with him as well as played volleyball, miniature golf...hell I've even gone hiking with the guy. The point is that people with "disabilities" find their own way to deal with their lives. But, the general public sees them and pitties them for their "misfortunes." We make up terms like "handicapable" to make sure not to offend "these people," but really, it's even more of a back-handed insult...just a slap in the face. Sure, handicapped people take advantage of the leeway we give them, but if they had it their way, they'd do everything normal just like us. But, the public won't let them. So, it's because of "normal" assholes that I have to wait for wheelchair guy to get on the bus, it's not his fault at all. Yet another argument that supports my thesis...normal people suck. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, November 5th, 2004
7:24 pm	I'd Better Curb My Enthusiasm Before I Get Myself Into Trouble... I woke up a little late this morning, so by the time I was up and about, Dustin was already off to school. I did my usual lounging about and wandering around the kitchen looking for something suitable to have for the morning's sustinence. Finally, 8:30 rolled around and it was time for me to throw on some clothes and head out the door. I got dressed, put on a hat and went to brush my teeth. I grabbed my toothbrush and...noticed that it was wet. I thought to myself, Did I already brush my teeth? No, no I hadn't. I check the bristles again...they were soaking wet...as if someone used it and rinsed it not more than a half hour ago. But, I hadn't brushed my teeth since last night. Then, it hit me. I dropped the toothbrush in disgust at my realization: Dustin used my toothbrush this morning. I ran out to the living room to confirm. Surely enough, Mom and Katey hadn't brushed their teeth yet, and Dad was still asleep. Dustin used my toothbrush. The kid's mouth is gross, to begin with...I don't want to go into details, for your (the Reader's) sake...but it's not even that. I just don't like the idea of having someone else's stinking rot all over my toothbrush. That's MY toothbrush for MY teeth, not someone elses GERMS. This is when I started to think about what a total Seinfeld moment this was. And I started to think some more on this. Michael and I have actually discussed this before, but it really struck me today. My life is just like one giant Seinfeld episode. Seinfeld has always been a popular show, even since it went off the air. And for some reason, LATELY Seinfeld has been getting a sort of re-surgence in popularity, especially with Curb Your Enthusiasm doing so well. For those of you who don't know, Curb Your Enthusiasm is a show based on the fictional life of real life comedian and co-creator of Seinfeld, Larry David. Larry David is basically George, Jerry, and even Elaine mixed together, with ALL of their neuroticism and NO shame. I feel that lately I've become a lot like Larry David. I always have been at heart, but lately I've been picking up a lot of the way he talks and even moves. When I'm making a point nowadays, I hold my hands up in front of me and extend both of my index fingers, a-la-Larry David, as if I'm stopping (with my hands) the point that was just made, clearing room for my next big point to make it's entrance. I also find myself saying very Larry David/Seinfeld-esque comments such as: "Eh...hot dogs...i've had enough. They're at parties, they're at ball games, they're everywhere. I'm done with 'em." "In retrospect, I probably should have given him the toast..." "Eh...the hugging lately...I'm not hot on the hugging. Not a big fan of the hug." "They think they're all that just because they're from the 'East Coast.' OOOOHHH! OH! The East Coast, oooooh! Mr. Big shot from the East Coast thinks he can make better donuts, oooooh" And not only this, but you'll notice that Larry David and the main characters from Seinfeld are horribly immoral and mean people. Lately, I've found myself having conversations that aren't very PC at all and really not caring. Michael, too. In fact, Michael and I have done our fair share of unethical things just to prove a point or satisfy some sort of self-justification...like the time Michael publicly "outed" a lesbian because there was no way he could prove it, but he just knew it was true. There's also the time when I recently ran into my ex-girlfriend. Here, take a look at this re-enactment of a conversation Michael and I had...this is roughly how it went, I can't remember the exact wording, but it was pretty much just like this... Kyle: So, hey remember my ex? Michael: Yeah... Kyle: ...FAT. Michael: What? Kyle: She's put on a lot of weight. She's like fat now. Michael: Oh, wow, that's weird. What's your point? Kyle: My point is that I feel like I've won somehow. Michael: Won? Kyle: Yeah, you know...like when people break up, one person is innevitably going to do better than the other person, and I'm obviously the person who's better off without her. It's like a run-off...in that sense, I feel like I've won. Michael: So, if the person has a horrible life after you, then they've lost? Kyle: Yes, exactly. Michael: And you're the cause? Kyle: Indirectly, yes. Michael: What if she dies? Kyle: Was it suicide? Michael: No, just normal death. Kyle: Well, in that case then I'd say it's a draw, because death is brought on by outside circumstances not relating to personal relationships. However, if death was self-inflicted, then i'd have to say that, yes, victory would be handed to me. See, it's not that I don't care about my ex, it's not that I'm happy she's put on some weight, and it DEFINITLEY isn't because I take death so lightly ( I don't), but it was just a thought that I had that I expressed vocally. I mean, we ALL think of these things, but we don't always say them. For having these conversations, I'm not worse than someone else, I'm just more in tune to the fact that the thoughts I have are normal and not to be dismissed. In that sense, I think that's why everyone can relate to Seinfeld. We all think the things that George and Jerry think, the only difference is that they actually act on the principles they have, and not just quietly let them slip by. It makes life a hell of a lot more interesting and, most importantly, funny. *P.S. No offense meant to anyone in this post. This post was purely for fun. And, I know who the people are that might be worrying right now...my advice to them: don't worry, be happy. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, November 1st, 2004
10:57 am	I'm a film score collector. I love music from movies and it is, besides filmmaking, my one true hobby. There is a website that I visit regularly called "Filmtracks.com" that I have linked from this page, actually. This website provides me with up-to-date reviews of scores and loads of information about composers and music. I check this site practically every day, and today I saw this post out of nowhere: 10/31/04 - Tuesday is presidential election day in the United States, challenging Americans with one of the toughest decisions of modern times. In 1996 and 2000, Filmtracks endorsed Bill Clinton and Al Gore, and those preferences were based on traditional social and economic beliefs held by the owners of this site. In 2004, though, the situation is different because Filmtracks has for the first time felt the indirect reactions of presidential politics in its daily dealings with its own readers. Over the past two years, soundtrack collectors all around the world have continued sending their usual flow of music-related remarks and inquiries to Filmtracks. But in that time, it has become frightfully common for these e-mails to be ended with comments such as "I think your site is awesome, but I don't like what your country is doing in Iraq," "no offense, but how can you stand being led by that war-mongering Bush?," and our favorite, "if George Bush was the American submarine captain in The Hunt for Red October, his cowboy diplomacy would have killed the entire lot!" Such comments may seem frivolous, but their frequency is alarming. When American politics become so unpopular around the world that these issues invade e-mails about soundtracks from readers, then you know that the importance of this election transcends the last ones. The readers of this site come from countries all over the world, and they are typically younger, educated people. Despite what George W. Bush tells Americans in his speeches, the opinions of these folks in other nations do count. They will forgive the American electoral system for installing Bush despite his minority tally in the 2000 popular vote; after all, every country makes mistakes. But Americans run the dangerous risk of rejecting the world's readiness to give them a second chance... a chance to prove that the United States isn't just another isolationism-touting nation using its culture and capitalism as means of subversive, imperial influence. Not a single Filmtracks reader has e-mailed the site with a soundtrack comment and subsequently expressed support for Bush and America's global military efforts. The pleas for "anyone but Bush" are loud and clear, though, and with these last two years of Filmtracks e-mails in mind, we wholeheartedly support John F. Kerry for president. Remember to vote, Americans! - Christian Clemmensen After reading this, I decided to write the webmaster an e-mail. It is exactly as follows: To whom it may concern: I want you to know that I've never before felt compelled enough to write to a webmaster, but I feel that, as a regular visitor to your site, I should tell you that I will most likely not be visiting your site anymore. Over the past two years, since your site was recommended to me through a friend and fellow soundtrack collector, I've been a faithful reader of all of the site's reviews. I use the site to make purchasing decisions, I've used it as a reference in term papers, as I am a film major at a California State University, and I've even referred the site as a wonderful base of information to all of my friends who are beginning to learn more about the world of film music. Your site is always the first site I check online every day after I check my e-mail. In fact, as of yesterday morning, I was so excited about your review for "Alexander" that I immediately set out to order my own copy online. The reason I'm writing you is because I feel that I have been excluded from your website as per your politically-minded post on October 31, 2004. I'm sure you may have received a few e-mails like this already, but please don't stop reading this e-mail right now. I feel that I have one or two valid points in this e-mail that I should like you to at least hear and, considering how much time I have devoted to your website, you can at least devote five minutes to my words. Despite the fact that I was offended by certain opinions-made-accusations included in your post, including the idea that the American electoral system is a "mistake," the reason I'm not going to visit your site anymore is not because I'm a republican and don't agree with you on all of your views. I'm not going to visit your site anymore because you've let politics leak in to the one area of film that transcends national politics: music. The world has become a place where all types of media feature political agendas, from commercial music to films - films especially, what with the vocal sensibilities of Hollywood actors and actesses and the liberal and conservative propaganda popping up at practically every turn in screenwriting today. Music in film is the one area that can be enjoyed by all without a thought of politics. Even when a score is written with politics in mind, for films such as "Fahrenheit 9/11" or even the recent "Manchurian Candidate" (both of which you have reviewed), it is the aesthetic value and artistic merit of the music that is important. My point is that as a site that reviews music and examines the importance of music in film, you have no responsibility or obligation to comment on the political views of your readers. I understand that many of your readers comment on politics, but when it comes down to it, how is it your responsibility to acknowledge those sentiments? Moreover, how is it your responsibility to acknowledge them publicly and exclude the other half of a nation that is going to vote for Bush tomorrow? I'm sure many of the e-mails that you receive are from conservative republicans, but of course you're only hearing from liberals and people from other countries because only they have cause for complaint. I'm not going to write you an e-mail regarding your review for "Return of the King" and write "Long Live Bush" at the end of the letter just for the hell of it. And even if I did, you still have no responsibility for my opinions and have no obligation to reply to the political side of my e-mail, considering you are a site that reviews music, not national politics. But, you have decided to go the other route. By doing so, I feel that you are most likely playing it safe. If there is vocal opposition against Bush, then the thing to do to save yourself from any sort of opposition is to just go along with it. However, it seems as though by doing so you are excluding that portion of readers who may have political beliefs different from your own, but acknowledge that this site is not meant for politics, but for the enjoyment of music. Until today, I thought you shared my belief that film music is a sanctuary from worldly strife and should be viewed both objectively and subjectively from artistic viewpoints and not from the mindset of "anyone but Bush" or pro-Bush sentiments or any political point of view, for that matter. As a reader, it's not my responsibility to tell you how to run your site. I understand that it's your site and under the Bill of Rights (which is something we can both agree should be upheld at any cost) you can say and do whatever you like to say and do. But, as a reader I feel that it is my responsibility to let you know that the way you are running your site is affecting some of your readers and I feel that it's my obligation to you, to myself, and to all of your readers to inform you that I feel that you have gone against the values of what this site should be and was once. Former Filmtracks.com reader, Kyle J. Scott Mind you, I did not write this post to make ANY political statement. It wasn't the fact that I may or ay not have agreed with what he had to say. Even if I completely, full-heartedly agreed with him, I would have written the exact same letter...because what it boils down to is the fact that he let politics pollute the one thing in my life that isn't connected with any of the world's crap: music. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, October 28th, 2004
9:07 am	WTF? Btw...what's with the lack of journal entries lately? I join the LJ crowd and NOW you decide to stop posting on a regular basis? Come on people...work with me. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
9:07 am	In My Room Well, I fixed the computer in my room so now I'm back online...and not only am I back, but I can now type within the comfort of my room! This means I can go online late at night and hopefully it means I'll get a lot more writing done. In fact, ever since this computer has been in my room...every time I sit down at my desk, I get this surge of creative energy. I feel like I can write forever here at my desk...my desk on which I have hatched and developed all of my major movie ideas. It seems as though the comfort here in my room and at my desk releases me from some sort of inhibition that I have when I'm in the outside world...I think clearly and constantly...hell, since I've hooked my computer up, I've already had an idea for a new movie and even a play. Now if I only had the motivation and patience to actually write a complete work, Shades of Gray would be on Broadway right now and Sincerely would be opening in a theater near you... (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, October 25th, 2004
10:03 am	Sunday Wars: A New Hope or May The Bowler's Handicap Be With You, Darth Vader So my day yesterday was one of the best days ever. It began well enough...I didn't have work until three, so basically my plan for the day was to stay home and lay around the house for as long as possible. We went to breakfast at Millie's and when I came home, I sat at the now fixed computer in my room to write a blog about how relaxing writing in my room was when there was a phone call for me. I thought it was Michael, since I had missed his call the previous day, but when I put my ear to the reciever, I heard a harsh voice say, "Kyle, are you dressed and ready to go?" After the question was finished, I recognized my boss' voice...then the fact that my boss was calling me to see if I was ready to go hit me like a ton of bricks. "Oh...why?" I asked. He explained that a co-worker of mine didn't show up for her 11:00 party, so I had to come in and work it for her. My day turned from potentially great to complete disaster in a single moment. I agreed to come in (did I really have a choice?), so I got on a shirt and headed in. When I got to work 15 minutes later, the co-worker who didn't show up had shown up suddenly about two minutes before I arrived. She was there, working the party. I went in to see my bossed, more annoyed than I've been in a long time. "You're fucking with me, right?" I asked him. He told me that I could either go home or stay and work the party with her and we could split the tips. Since it was a small party, I decided to stay and get the tip...because basically I could let her do all the work and then I would get a cut of the tip AND I'd be on the clock. Time is money, after all. This is when the day gets interesting. Besides the regular Sunday birthday parties, there was a foundraising event in the alley as well. It was for an organization called "Yes I Can" and apparently it's a child abuse foundation. They come every year, and I remembered them because the girl selling the raffle tickets was the same uber-hot girl from the year previous (I bought ten dollars worth of tickets from her...how could I refuse?). Anyway, I was standing at the desk letting Theresa (the late co-worker) do all the work when all of a sudden I see Princess Leia walk by. Must be a Halloween thing, I thought to myself. But in a few minutes, after I had helped Theresa with the cutting of the birthday cake, I saw a life-sized R2-D2 right by the front desk! And I found out that this R2 was not just any R2, he was fully automated and there was a total Star Wars geek who was running him by remote control...so basically it just looked like an actual functioning R2! I got pumped because obviously some birthday party had hired Leia and R2 to do the party. I was...sort of right. A few minutes later there was a line of Star Wars characters marching into the bowling alley. Storm Troopers, Sand Troopers, Imperial Pilots, Rebel Pilots, Luke Skywalker, and Darth Vader! They were all there to help with the "Yes I Can" foundraiser! And the amazing thing about it was that these weren't just people from a troop who dressed in Star Wars Halloween costumes and paraded around, these were people with authentic Star Wars costumes with actual armor and helmets...the whole works. I mean, Darth Vader was seriously wearing the exact same thing that appeared in the movies. They even had these little mouthpieces under their helmets that made them sound like the characters from the movies when they talked. Then I found out that Jared, one of the desk guys, had his digital camera with him. I HAD to have a picture with Darth Vader, at least. So, I went up to Vader and asked him for a picture. I took this amazing pic where it looked like he was holding me up by my neck and choking me. Then, I got a picture with R2...and then a most amazing thing happened. The Star Wars characters decided to BOWL! I mean, there was a Storm Trooper at the desk asking for bowling shoes! Thinking this was one of the most amazing things I've ever seen, I asked Jared to document the entire event. He got pictures of the Storm Troopers drinking from plastic cups with straws, he got Princess Leia holding a bowling ball...there's even a picture of me holding a Storm Trooper's helmet while the Trooper was putting his bowling shoes on in the background! Then...it happened. The one of the single most memorable moments in my 20 long years of life. Darth Vader wanted to throw a few balls down the lanes. He was going to change out of is costume to bowl, but we talked him into throwing at least one ball down the lane in full garb. He did...and he bowled a STRIKE! I saw Darth Vader bowl a strike in FULL costume! When he made that strike, everyone cheered him, but I went crazy! I was screaming at the top of my lungs...it was awesome to see Darth Vader...the most infamous villain in film history...bowl a strike at my bowling alley. After the excitement, I hung out with the Star Wars guys for a while and talked about how much their costumes ran for (we're talking anywhere from 500 to 5,000 dollars), I talked to the R2 guy about what he thought about having R2 completely computer animated for the 3rd movie (he was fumed), and I was quoting Star Wars lines with the Imperial Pilot and the Sand Trooper. Eventually they took off. I said to them all, "May the force be with you" and they went on their way. For the rest of the day I was humming and singing the Star Wars soundtrack aloud for everyone to hear. To top the day off, Rosy ended up comming to the carnival after all. We had a great time...the carnival was run by a different company this year, so they had all new rides. One ride in particular was pretty fun. My mom worked the corndog booth the whole time and I scored plenty of free Filipino food (Thanks to Anna'a mom and Janette). Rosy won us some money at rainbowball...although not enough to cover the amount I ended up spending on ride tickets. In all...a great day. Couldn't have been better. BTW, the pictures I was talking about will be posted as soon as Jared e-mails them to me. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 20th, 2004
9:29 am	Hmm? Computer is down at home, so my only link to the outside world is through the CSUN library computers, which means no Kyle on AIM for quite some time...unless I can fix my OLD computer that's in my room...then I'll be on all night long for you night owls out there. I know it's been a while since my last post, but if it's any consolation, I'm working on a killer Disneyland post that's about the length of a Stephen King novel. Why else haven't I posted? Well, I've been sort of swamped, to tell you the truth. I've got this video for confirmation I'm working on...I've started to work days for my mom's business, my weekends are nothing but hours on end of serving ungreatful kids and their even more ungreatful parents (judging by their tips) at Corbin Bowl. But, it's not all bad...I've seen pretty good movies (Team America: World Police) and I'm spending much more time with certain amazing people (or person, you know who you are). At any rate, I just thought I'd update a bit so no one worries that I might have contracted some horrible disease or gone AWOL for good. Be back soon. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 5th, 2004
9:05 am	Suck it, Captain Kirk Oh, I am in a STAR WARS mood, baby! As most of you know, last week the three original STAR WARS movies came out on DVD. On top of that, The new STAR WARS video game came out for my PS2, STAR WARS BATTLEFRONT. Needless to say, since last week, I've had STAR WARS on the brain! I freaking love STAR WARS. Not the "new" STAR WARS, like Episode 1 or the horrid Episode 2, but I'm talkin the OG STAR WARS...A NEW HOPE, EMPIRE STRIKES BACK, and RETURN OF THE JEDI. I remember back in the day when no one really cared about it. I was at my friend Milo's house once when I was a kid and RETURN OF THE JEDI came on. I was pumped because ROTJ is my favorite SW movie. I said to Milo, "Hey! This is the best one, this is the one with the Ewoks, and it's also the one where Yoda dies." Then Milo was like, "Yoda doesn't die." And I was like, "Uh-huh" and he was like "uh-UH!" Of course, I was right because I rule and he was a fool, but the thing was that LATER...in 1997, to be exact...when the Special Editions were released, there was this HUGE STAR WARS revival and Milo became this huge die-hard STAR WARS fan. Eventually, he knew more than me about SW...he had all the toys, he had all the momorabilia, he knew all the terminoligy, and he had all the books. Of course, this is where the split occured in the STAR WARS fan universe...I call it "The Great Star Wars Rift." See, there are two kinds of STAR WARS fans. THE FIRST kind is the OG...the "TRUE" SW fan. These are people like me, people who have loved the movies since before the "Special Editions." These people get all of their SW knowledge by watching the first three movies and being religiously loyal to them. THE SECOND kind of STAR WARS fan is the "New Wave" fan. These are the people who were only first exposed to SW when the "Special Editions" came out. These people are pauns of an aging George Lucas. They believe that the special editions are the RIGHT way to watch STAR WARS, because they believe all the crap that comes from the mouth of a "god" like George Lucas. These people also typically like STAR WARS: THE PHANTOM MENACE better than A NEW HOPE, which BOGGLES the mind. Also, it's THESE people that read all the fan-fiction and can tell you the history of the clone wars and talk about the "shadow of the empire." THEY think that they know MORE about STAR WARS than the OG fans just because they've read the fan-fiction...but OG fans stand by the fact that the only TRUE SW knowledge can be attained from the movies. Regardless of fans, the movies still rock my socks. Michael came over the other day and we watched the special edition DVD of A NEW HOPE. Sure, I was bothered by the new Lucas-isms all over the place...but the amazing picture quality quickly made me forget about THAT. I mean, this is the first time we've ever seen SW on DVD before...this is the BEST we've ever seen SW. And all the new Lucas stuff is actually fairly decent, with the exception of the overly computerized Tatooine and Jabba the Hut dialogue sequence (which Rosy happened to call during, thank God). But, the thing is that watching this movies brought back a flood of memories from my childhood. I remember watching SW for the first time at my grandma's house. Also, Michael and I were being the huge dorks that we were and were yelling out lines from the STAR TOURS ride at Disneyland. When Han Solo brings the Falcon out of hyper-speed and they're in a meter shower, Michael and I were yelling "Comets? COMETS?!" just like in the ride. Also, some classic lines were quoted, such as "We've passed the Endor moon!" and "Star Tours? What are you doing here? Ease off on your main thrusters..." On top of all this, this STAR WARS BATTLEFRONT game that's out totally kicks ass. You can fight on any planet, fly any vehicle, on ANY side. Yes, I fought as the rebellion AND the empire both on the same level. I have driven X-Wings, Y-Wings, Tie Fighters, Land Speeders, Speeder bikes...AT AT's! Come on, AT AT's!!! I even got to fight Darth Vader himself. The whole day yesterday was like a dream come true playing this game. I'm getting damn good at it, too. STAR WARS kicks ass...and any STAR TREK geek that says otherwise can suck my big fat light saber. May the force be with you. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, October 3rd, 2004
8:44 pm	Vegetarianism...A.K.A. Vege-awesome-anism After Kat's comment about how I have to find something wrong with everything, I had a sort of contemplative moment...maybe I'm a negative person. I wrote all about it in my blog (which you should all be reading religiously), but basically in the long run it didn't bother me too much. I did, however, go back and check ALL of my old blog posts searching for a blog in which I had only positive things to say...and unless it was about a movie, there was no such post. So, someone suggested that I write a positive post. The thing about positive posts is that I can't see how interesting it can be...when I write about the positive, I can only say "man, this is amazing" so many times, wheras when there's something wrong with something, it's easy for me to write all about it, hitting every little detail. However, I'm determined to try this "positive" thing...only I wasn't able to think of anything positive enough to write about. And then, it hit me...like a ton of bricks... BEING A VEGETARIAN IS AWESOME!!! Ok, I know many of you might be thinking, "whoa...did Kyle just say what I think he just said?" Well, yes, I did. Vegetarians are amazing people. You know why? WHERE DO I BEGIN?!?? REASONS VEGETARIANS ROCK 1.) VEGETABLES ARE PREDOMINATELY GREEN - Green is the greatest color to have graced this world of ours. Since most vegetables are green, they are lucky enough to always see green. This is especially good if green is the vegetarian's favorite color. 2.) RARE OR WELL DONE? NEITHER - Eating meat can be an inconvenience. I always have to worry about what meat I want...whether or not I want it well done or rare. When you are a vegetarian...it's like a total load is lifted off your shoulders because not only are you saving animals, but you don't have to put up with the stress of deciding how you want your meat served. Translation: vegetarians are lucky. 3.) CONVERSATION PIECE - You always have something to talk about when you're a vegetarian. It's always a great topic of conversation. Sometimes vegetarians will run into stubborn-minded people who don't agree with it. These conversations or confrontations can be uncomfortable and sometimes extremely stressful. Sometimes these people are your family or friends, which doesn't really help the vegetarian's esteem. But, the vegetarian need not worry...they're standing up for soemthing they believe in. Whether people see it or not, the vegetarian is a strong person...a person of principle who sees what others do not. They are stronger than I am, and I commend them for not giving in to pressures that would no doubt doom the very people they have to argue against. 4.) SMELL - Let's face it...vegetarians just smell better. They don't eat all that greasy, oily, heavy meat. This leads into a whole hygein thing. There's less to ruin your teeth, kissing's GOTTA be easier for them after a heavy meal, and it's healthier for the body in general. I could go on aboutthis for a loooong time, because being vegetarian for good reasons is probably one of the best moves you can make. Sometimes people just don't understand, but the vegetarian can do good for the world in the form of informing others about the advantages of being a vegetarian. All of the vegetarians I know (only one real one) are my favorite people. In fact, I forgot to mention the first and foremost reason why vegetarians are the luckiest people... 5.) ROSY - Dude, if Rosy's a vegetarian, it's gotta be awesome. I love that she's a vegetarian cause that's one of the many many things that make her unique. I'm sure ALL of you can agree with me. Plus she introduced me to...::gulp:: tofu...which I...::GULP:: REALLY liked! Ok, everyone that's about it. Until next time. (8 Comments |Comment on this)